Tuesday, October 01, 2002
A funny chatlog story...@arryana> once upon a time there was a castle deep in an enchanted wood
@Benway> and in the castle lived a magical talking snail
@arryana> the snail had one big dream in the world, and he thought about it night and day.
@Benway> it was his deepest desire to turn the forrest into lettuce with a spell from his spell book
@arryana> now, there was a problem with his plan, the wicked crow of the forest absolutely loathed lettuce
@Benway> and being a devious creature, the crow stuck the pages of the book together with glue, so the snail just slimed across them, leaving sticky marks
@arryana> ow, you know, that really hurts, cruel creature
@Benway> blame the crow, not me
@arryana> haha
@arryana> the snail didnt realize, at first why the spell didn't seem to read right
@Benway> especialy since he was so short sighted, that when he looked close enough to read the words, his eyes would hit the page, and retract back into his head
@arryana> as if it werent bad enough to be thwacked in the brain with his own eyeballs, it invariably made a "sproing" sound that caused his pet moth to giggle at him
@Benway> sadly, the moth giggled too loud, and hearing him, the wicked crow flew in through the window and ate him
@arryana> ack!
@arryana> you cant do that, pets only die in kevin costner movies
* @arryana looks outraged
@Benway> haha
* @Benway cracks up
* @arryana is gratified at cracking Benway up
@Benway> this is a tarantino fairly tale, everyone dies
@arryana> haha
@arryana> though the crow was evil, he wasn't very clever, and didn't realize he'd just eaten the most poisonous sort of moth alive.
@Benway> and as he slid down the dying crows throat, the moth could be heard muttering "take that MOTHafucker!"
@arryana> the crow hopped up to our valiant snail hero and collapsed on the open spellbook, poking his beak into the stuck pages.
@Benway> mirraculously, it's beak poked open the exact pages needed to cast the spell, leaving the snail with only a bad case of myopia to contend with
@arryana> the snail, being much cleverer than the recently deceased crow, decided to pop out the crows eyeballs and turn them into very snazzy reading spectacles.
@Benway> hahahaha
@Benway> however, he hadn`t considered the weight of the eyeballs, and as he put them on, his feeble little stalks bent so that they dragged along the table
@arryana> not so easily discouraged, he cut off the crow's feet at the ankle and made very sericeable tripods out of them, to hold up his poor stretched eyestalks.
@Benway> at first, the feet wanted to walk off in different directions, making seeing straight difficult, but he soon found that if he slid up onto the ankles together, he could ride them like hitched horses
@arryana> this distracted him completely for a time, and he failed to notice the dismembered crow's blood soaking into the spellbok
@Benway> but on discovering the situation, he found that the blood had unstuck the other pages, and so found a spell to turn himself into a vampire snail, so he could suck up all the blood
@arryana finds she simply cant top that
* @Benway chuckles
Labels: chatlogs
Steve 2:01 AM [+]
Comments:
Post a Comment
The Benway Empire |
 |